The Duck Lady Epic

This picture I took at the St. Louis Zoo reminds me of a story. (Isn't she a beauty?) All of the following is true as I remember it.

I am the Duck Lady. I am not ashamed of my affections and need to help the occasional stranded duck. Here is one of my stories that has illuminated my heroism. This is long!!!! But funny!

On a dark rainy morning of May 2003 I found myself in a situation which forced me to make a life changing decision. To intervene or not. To move or make a stand. To continue on my predetermined path or stray into uncharted territory. The time had come, "What would it be?"

Okay Way too dramatic. Redo, starting over. Ready, set, ACTION

On a rainy morning of May 2003 I watched a duck horror evolve right before my very eyes. I was waiting at a stop light at a very busy intersection on my way to Savanah's daycare. (Morning traffic was at its heaviest) Yes, Savanah went to daycare the first 9 months of her life as I was still working.

As I sat there I couldn't believe my eyes. Crossing in the crosswalk was a mother duck and many (maybe 12) baby ducks (very small only a few days old). Cars were screeching to halt. I was going to hop out of the car and direct traffic around her but it looked promising that she was going to make it across without my help. I was feeling relieved as the tragedy seem to be averted.

Then she (the mama duck) crosses over the sewer grate. GASP, GASP again, then I hear myself hollering "OH NO!!!" I watched in horror as 11 of the 12 ducks one by one plopped through the grate into the sewer!!!! I was shocked! "Holy Crap" What should I do?

The Mama had yet to realize that all of the baby ducks weren't following her. I am sure she was shocked when she turned to look and had gone from a mother of 12 to a mother of 1. When she noticed she turned around and started back where she came from quacking, looking for her babies.

My mind and heart were racing as my light turned green. What do I do? Savanah's daycare was right around the corner. I drove there quickly. I ran in the daycare like a lunatic muttering nonsense about baby ducks and a sewer. "Gotta go save, ducks fell, Mama duck, cars, ahhhhh" I ran out of the daycare promising an explanation later.

I made it back to the intersection still unsure of what I was going to do. The mama duck was causing a commotion trying to get to her babies. She was walking back and forth in the crosswalk with her 1 remaining baby.

I looked around, there was no one to help me. I scanned the area, the closest business was McDonald's of all places. Again I appeared to be a crazy lady as I ran in hollering . "Do you know the number for the police department?" "Do you have a phonebook?" "There are ducks in the sewer!" The 18, 19 and 20 year old kids working there just stared at me. The non-English speaking employees just said "huh?" It was apparent I wasn't getting anywhere with these people. I just ran out of McDonald's screaming, "Call 911, call 911"

I am not sure I can even explain the craziness of my actions. Not sure words will make do to paint this insane picture. But I am trying. With this next paragraph keep in mind this is during morning rush hour traffic. All the motorist are watching me. No one understands what I am doing. Anyone who saw the ducks fall is long gone. I imagine all the McDonald's employees have their faces glued to the window watching the crazy lady. I am certain no one actually called 911.

So I ran back to the intersection. I herded the Mama duck and 1 baby to the side of the road. I crossed the crosswalk to the center median. I got on my knees and looked in the grate with my butt up in the air! I couldn't see much but I could hear them quacking down the drain. I turned to look just in time to see the Mama heading into the crosswalk towards me as a car swerved around her. I herded her back to the side of the road.

"What the hell was I going to do??!!" I was motionless for a moment as I struggled with this dilemma. If I leave to go get help the Mama and baby will go into the road and get hit. But I am not helping the baby ducks just standing here.

Then I saw a police officer in a car. YAY!!!!!, I started jumping up and down, waving my arms, screaming, clapping my hands, doing anything and everything I could think of to get his attention. He had his blinker on and was about to turn away from me. Picture here a person stranded on a deserted island when a plane flies overhead. yeah that was me.

He turned and my heart sank to my shoes. I watched him go but then he turned around. And yes he came to my rescue.

This policeman was a young jock type, cool looking sun glasses, buff and tan. You know the type, power hungry. I got a little nervous as I noticed he looked somewhat excited as if he might get a foot chase with this crazy crack filled lady disrupting morning traffic. I pictured him throwing me to the ground and cuffing me as he jogged towards me with his hands making a calm down motion.

He asked me with a raised eyebrow, "What is the problem?" Of course I took a deep breath and started ranting and raving about the ducks. The Mama duck who had been hiding behind a tree, saved me, as if on cue, she ran back into the street quacking ferociously, obviously upset. The policeman looked disappointed shaking his head as he herded her back to the side of the road. All of this over a duck. There would be no excitement in Maple Grove today. I mentioned this duck was going to cause a car accident and that mobilized him. He went to the median, leaned over and he heard the baby ducks too. Thank God, I wasn't crazy.

He looked puzzled then hesitantly called for back up. He told me I could go now. I didn't want to leave but noticed I was already going to be an hour late for work. He saw me struggling with leaving. He promised me they would take care of it. He redeemed himself in my eyes as he looked at the quacking angry duck he said, "It's okay Mama we'll get your babies."

Ahhh I left feeling sure all was going to be okay. However, at work all I could think about was these ducks and what was the outcome. So at about 3:00 p.m. I called the Maple Grove Police department. With a very calm voice I explained in short what had happened. With humor I told the dispatcher, "I need to know what happened cause all I could think of all day was these damn ducks." Thankfully she laughed understanding my humor. She checked the log and said, well it says here, "Police arrived on the scene at 7:55 am. The scene was not cleared until 10:30 am." It says "resolved". She told me I think they got them out.

I breathed a sigh of relief. That evening I passed the scene of the crime! You could tell two of the sewer drains had been lifted up.

And although I was a little embarrassed by my actions, I enjoyed the humor of it all.

I slept well that night.

Joytobe

Now Hold On, Wait Just a Second Here

At the top header and description of my blog it says, "My husband loves to cook which is great, as I have little, if any, patience. "Continue to stir while simmering" just doesn't work for me. I say bring that pot to a full rolling boil."

Well this post is about my insane lack of patience for anything even slightly related to cooking. I got NONE.

My husband often laughs at me. He knows me well. If I put something, anything in the microwave I always stop it before the beep. My husband cracks up when he goes to use the microwave and it says, " 0:01" Like I couldn't just wait that one second before I grabbed my heated up coffee. It is true I could not wait.

When cooking up a frozen pizza, if it says cook 14 - 16 minutes, I will always choose 14 minutes! And even then I will probably take the pizza out after 13 minutes and 50 seconds.

Maybe this is why I like baking cookie cutter cookies. I can't sit and watch them bake. I am needing and rolling and cutting the shapes quickly just to get the next batch ready to throw in the oven. There is no time to be impatient. The cookies only take 7-8 minutes to bake. For sure this translates to me as "7 minutes".

Now I can chop up veggies with gusto. In fact I enjoy this activity but again it keeps me moving. It's the waiting I can't stand.

You would think I am super efficient keeping my home in order. Well not exactly, I do spend quite a bit of time just spinning my wheels. I am quite certain I have ADD. But hey that is another post all together.

Aren't you glad you don't live with me?
Joytobe

Playing With My Blog

Playing With My Blog

Doesn't that sound naughty?

For the next few days I am going to be "messing around with my blog". huh, still sounds naughty.

You may notice the design and layout of my blog will be changing. The content will not be changing. Still nonsense. I'm just trying to make it look pretty and make it more aesthetically pleasing to the eye. I may be adding a few gadgets as well. Wish me luck.

Stay with me and please be patient as I change it up.
Joytobe

Granny Ethel

My honey had a Granny Ethel (God rest her soul).

She left Jeff with this treasure, "If there is enough blue in the sky for a Dutchman's britches, it's going to be a nice day."

What does this mean? Are Dutchman's britches large? or small? I love this saying but struggle with the meaning.

Ode to the internet. I found this bit of information.
Admiral William Henry Smyth's A Sailor's Wordbook from 1867 reads as follows: "Dutchman's breeches, the patch of blue sky often seen when a gale is breaking, is said to be, however small, 'enough to make a pair of breeches for a Dutchman'."

Also this: the Random House Historical Dictionary of American Slang says "Dutchman's breeches" is nautical slang meaning 'a patch of blue sky visible through clouds'.

Still doesn't answer my question "Are a Dutchman's britches large or small?"

Joytobe

Think Soft......Think Hard

A cool concept thought up by my 7 year old daughter.

We just came back from Wisconsin Dells for a little family vacation. We had great fun. There is so much to do.

There is an awesome deer park. You walk around with food and the deer just come right up to you and eat. Some of them come up just to be petted. It was really neat. They are so beautiful and fragile looking. Big beautiful eyes and long eye lashes. Such kind faces. I am not sure how people can shoot them.

There is also a mining company where you get a bucket of dirt and sand. You put the contents in a strainer and get to keep whatever you find. We came home with some amethyst, garnet, quartz, sapphire and emerald. This sounds like an expensive treasure but I am quite certain these stones aren't truly jewelry making quality. However it is still a treasure to us!

This mining store also sold small pieces of dinosaur bone fossils. Savanah was very intrigued by this.

Later at the hotel we were talking and she said the following priceless gems.

"When you think about the deer park soft, it seems like no big deal. But when you think about it hard. Wow deer were just walking right up to me and letting me pet them."

Later she said,

"When you think about the dinosaur bones soft it doesn't seem special, but if you think about it hard, I'm holding a dinosaur bone!"

I like this concept! Let's look at everything hard! How wonderful to fully take in the magic, the true meaning and importance of things.

Take a hard look at the significance.
Joytobe

17 to 18

My daughter has always had the same favorite number. 17. I am not sure how she picked it. But it has remained constant.



Until yesterday. Savanah brought home a math workbook. It is more for fun and number sense. The 1st question asked, "What is your favorite number? Why?"



Her answer was this. 18 "because you can order things on TV."



This was too funny to me. As Jeff said, can't you just hear the announcer guy, "You must be 18 years or older to order."



Does my child watch too much T.V.?



My children and I have a number / color association. It is called color synesthesia. It is defined: an individual's perception of numbers and/or letters is associated with the experience of colors. I have had this all of my life. It is not like a disorder or anything bad. Many people have this. Basically when I think of a number I strongly picture a color. Even for instance if I see the number 5 in my mind it is green.



so my color palate is this. I put in bold the strongest associations.

1 is white
2 is light blue
3 is yellow
4 is blue
5 is green
6 is red
7 is orange
8 is purple
9 is brown
10 is black



Savanah's color palate is this;
1 is no color
2 is ?
3 is no color
4 is green
5 is orange
6 is red
7 is yellow
8 is green
9 is purple
10 is no color

Billy's color palate is this:
0 is white
1 is red
2 is yellow
3 is green
4 is red
5 is purple
6 is green
7 is purple
8 is orange
9 is no color
10 is white/red

Wierd isn't it?
Joytobe

No Post Sundays

Have a fantastic day!

The Fulgurite. The what?

For Mother's Day I got a fulgurite. It kind of sounds like a naughty word, doesn't it? Say it out loud with me, fulgurite. Again..... fulgurite. Now that you have said it do you wanna know what it means?

Well it's not a dirty word. But I like saying it anyways. You know how certain words you just like saying?

Fulgurites are natural hollow glass tubes formed in sand or soil by lightening strikes. They are formed when lightning with a temperature of at least 1,800 °C (3,270 °F) instantaneously melts silica on a conductive surface and fuses grains together; the fulgurite tube is the cooled product.

Isn't that the coolest thing ever? My rock hound daughter gave it to me as a present. You are basically holding in your hand the path a bolt of lightening took as it hit the earth. In fact the lightening made this glass tube.

It isn't pretty and to some it doesn't look like much.

But I think it's priceless.

Joytobe

Savanah - The Frog Veterinarian

My dear Savanah found a frog with a little cut on it. Apparently Jeff ran over it with the lawn mower or whacked it with the weed whacker. (Isn't weed whacker a funny word?) Luckily it was just a flesh wound.

Savanah got wet paper towels and cleaned off the blood until it was no longer bleeding. She cared for this frog with all of her 7 year old skill. The frog has recovered nicely and will shortly be released back into the wild.

She was very proud of herself for this humane accomplishment. She was telling me all about it. I told her, " You are a veterinarian." She looked at me quizzically.

Then she shrugged her shoulders kind of shook her head no. She looked at me and said, "But I like to eat meat."

It took me a moment but I realized she had confused the words veterinarian with vegetarian.

Oh was that amusing. After I finished explaining she still asked, "Do veterinarians eat meat?" Hmmm good question, If you care for animals, granted domesticated animals, do you still eat animals..meat?

I suddenly felt a tongue twister coming on. Something like
If the veterinarian was not a vegetarian
but the vegetarian was a veterinarian,
Were either of them vegans?

Oh Savanah you crack me up. I crack myself up too.
Joytobe

Clarification - Worry Versus Fear

Recently I posted information about a few conversations my son and I have had about the book "The Lord of the Flies".

You can read all the gory details here. http://joytobelieve.blogspot.com/2010/06/thinking-for-himself.html

But the gist of the disagreement was my son believes "everything we do as humans is motivated by fear." He gave me many examples of why he thinks this way. I disagree.

My husband read the blog post. Soon he and I were discussing this matter. (I love this kind of philosophical speak. It gets my mind pumped up!) It was my husband who found the answer I needed so desperately. I couldn't find the right words to defend and reasonable explain my feelings. I couldn't explain why I disagreed so vehemently. Believe it or not my opinionated mouth was speechless. My honey found my reasoning for me.

Now I am not saying Billy is wrong because he should have his own opinion. I am just saying I am right. ;)

So to look into this matter we need to define a couple of things.

Fear (noun): an emotion of alarm and agitation caused by the expectation or realization of danger. Synonyms: alarm, dread, fright, horror, panic, terror, trepidation

Fear (verb): to be afraid of

Afraid (adjective): Filled with terror or fear

Worry (verb): to feel uneasy, to turn over in the mind, to cause to feel anxious, distressed or troubled, anxious concern. Synonyms: concern, distress, pother, stew.

Now here is where it gets tricky. Many people use the word afraid when they really mean worry. But they are NOT synonymous. They truly mean different things. I think in general when you are afraid you are probably worried too. But You can be worried without being afraid. Does that make any sense? I read that paragraph over like 50 times. It makes sense to me but barely!

So I worry about his grades. I am not afraid or fearful about his grades. Well maybe a little afraid.

My actions are not motivated by fear (well sometimes). Often they are motivated by worry or concern. I am not a slave to my fears. Well maybe my fear of flying. That is about it..... oh yeah and my fear of the dentist chair! The sound of the dentist drill can send me sprinting away.

This is how you know you should be married. My honey knows me so well he can find my reason when I've lost it! I love my husband so because ... he could finish my sentences for me but he doesn't.

Hope that clears that all up.
Joytobe

My Birthday....His Birthday Suit

So last week was my birthday, June 2nd. I turned 39. gasp. Now I am 39 and holding. I will not get older than 39. I still love my birthday. I used to feel indifferent about my birthday. Until I met my husband. My honey has a way about him. He finds great joy in showing the people he loves how special they are to him. On my birthday he always makes me feel so wonderful. So although I have stopped aging I will continue to celebrate my birthday. Hey everyone deserves to be princess for the day!

So this past Wednesday a blogging story was revealed right before my very eyes. ;)

To begin with my honey slept in that day (he always takes the day off on my birthday). He had been at the hospital late the night before with his mom. So I was happy to let him sleep in. I got the kids off to school. Then Billy texted me, he needed something he forgot at home. It needed to be turned in that day. So I kissed sleeping Honey and high tailed it up to the school with the forgotten item. On my way home I stopped at McDonald's for yummy greasy breakfast. hmmm yum bacon egg and cheese biscuit.

When I walked in the door I saw my honey was up and sitting on the couch. I smiled and excitedly showed him the grease stained McDonald's bag, "I got breakfast! no dieting today!" He just looked at me with this enormous smile on his face. His hands were behind his head as he leaned back supporting his head. This smile was unusual. Not his normal smile. It was too animated. Too big. Like he had something up his sleeve! Like the joker. Very unusual. puzzling. I stared at him as I set my things down and slipped off my shoes. "Is everything okay?" I asked.

He just continued to smile not saying a word. As my eyes adjusted to the dimness of the room I noticed he had his shirt off. My honey has the sexiest chest. Not meaning to get graphic here but it is truth. I took a step forward, then another. My eyes widened as I realized my honey was NAKED!!!! With my birthday card covering up his privates. I gasped in shock and appreciation. And then I fell to the floor laughing. Then he started laughing too. It was awesome. This is not really characteristic for my honey. In fact he was trying to see the reaction from me. And he did. When I pulled myself together I hopped right over that couch and well.......

The funniest part of it is what he told me later. He watched the road waiting to see my car. Then threw his clothes off and assumed the position. But he said he panicked just before I opened the door. He thought, what if Billy got sick at school and I was bringing him home. What if Billy was walking in the door first. His heart raced as he heard the door knob begin to turn. His smile was so large because he was relieved to see my face.

Thank goodness, can you imagine if it had been Billy? That would have been a hefty therapy bill!

I just love him and his ability to make me smile! And he still surprises me.

Happy Birthday to me!
Joytobe

The Magic Mirror - Pama and Pampa

Well this is a story that needs to be told. I know my Pama would blush and giggle. I really don't think she would mind. Well she would act like she minded because she is a proper lady but I think she finds this so amusing herself. It needs to be preserved for history's sake. So without further ado....here is the story of how my grandparents met and fell in love.

My grandmother was raised in an orphanage with her sister after her parents died of tuberculosis. If you want to read about that here is the post.
http://joytobelieve.blogspot.com/2010/05/my-pama.html

When she was eighteen she and her sister lived together sharing an apartment. Pama worked in a hospital. She would see Lloyd (Pampa) on her way to work. He was smitten the first time he saw her. Pampa was a mailman, sorry Pampa.... I mean a letter carrier. He hated to be called a mailman. He delivered mail to her house. He said he hoped everyday that she would receive a package so he could go to her door and speak to her.

One particular day he got his wish. There was a package! He rang the doorbell several times before she appeared. He was persistent. He was not leaving the package on the doorstep. Apparently Pama had just gotten out of the shower. She grabbed a towel and held it in front of her body as she answered the door. Now when I think back at this I am a little surprised by her actions especially thinking of how proper everyone was back then. I suppose since she was raised in an orphanage and had no official chaperon or parents that affected her behavior.

Pampa was happy to see her and possibly even happier to see the towel draped across her body. He left the package with her. The next day he walked her to work. Shortly after her began full on courting her. They were engaged and later married.

Years after they were married Pampa told Pama the day he delivered that package he fell in love with her. It was sweet. A few years after that he told her, when she had stood in the doorway that day with that towel draped over the front of her body, she had been standing in front of a mirror. He had seen the entire back side of her body. And that was the day he knew he was going to marry her.

Oh man how I wish I had that mirror. Who knows where it went but that would have been priceless. That mirror ensured my existence.

Love that story. Love my Pama and (God rest his soul) Pampa,
Joytobe

No Post Sundays

Enjoy your day!
Joytobe

Surgery Update

It's been an up and down kind of week. A little roller coaster-ish. My mother-in-law's surgery went well. Then she had some complications with low blood pressure and low hemoglobin leading the doctors to believe she had some internal bleeding. After several tests it was determined she had a little bleeding that luckily resolved itself without further surgery being needed. A blood transfusion really turned things around.

Now we have found out 2 of the 11 lymph nodes taken out were malignant. Not the news we wanted to hear. But thankfully not as bad as it sounds. We will get the whole picture when we meet with the oncologist. The good news is from her scans and x-rays it appears the cancer has not spread to other organs or surrounding tissue. Her spirits are high and optimistic. She is handling all of this like a strong lady!

And just as of ten seconds ago I spoke to her. SHE IS HOME! Yeah discharged this morning.

Thank you God,
Joyce

Thinking For Himself

My son is so insightful. We have wonderful conversations about books he is reading in English. I usually ask him about the book and ask him to remind me the story line as I read these books one hundred years ago. Okay truth be told 20 or so years ago. The "or so" is very important here. Lots of days gone by. Can you believe it? Oh yeah we're talking about him here not me and my old age.

I love hearing his point of view. We often disagree and I love hearing him defend his opinion. I love watching him listen intently to my opinion. He is amazing to me. These are the most wonderful discussions. We have taught him to respectfully disagree with an adult. It's one of those parenting moments where you say, "I did good here." I see him becoming a man. A man I would want to call my friend.

However, with this latest book I am having a dilemma. His latest read was "Lord of the Flies" by William Golding. This book is very dark. I actually pulled out my "Lord of the Flies" essay dated 1/28/88. I kept it! Well I got an A and the teacher wrote, "You know how to achieve transitions and to insert minor details in subordinate clauses." "You are really developing! Keep up the good work!" Yes my teacher used exclamation points!! And she was a hard ass for sure. She certainly knew when to use exclamation points where I use them all the time! See! I digress again turning this writing to be about me. oooppss

Anyways this book is about the effects of human nature when society's conditioning is no longer present with its laws and boundaries. Basically in the book most characters will revert back to being barbarous savages. My son's essay was to answer the following question, "Do you believe that Golding is telling us that we are all doomed, or does he believe there is hope for humans?

Billy believes we are all doomed. He really feels people are inherently evil. That we keep this evil at bay everyday with our choices. This is very contradictory to what I believe, that everyone has good and bad within them. But mostly good. We fight off the bad intentions by dealing with the emotions that cause them, jealousy, anger, sadness, hatred, annoyance. I'm all about the choices we make also.

Here is where we really differ. Billy feels very strongly that "everything we do as humans is motivated by fear." Basically the only thing that causes us to take action is fear. At first I was repelled by this notion of his. Ewe yuck, no that is wrong, we care that is why we take action. We feel.

Then he asked me to give him examples of times I have taken action. So I gave the example of seeing a car accident and stopping to see if anyone needed help or was hurt. He turned this around and said, "You're afraid of what people will think of you if you don't stop." No he was wrong and I told him so. Most of the time I could give a crap what people think, especially strangers. Then he said, "Okay, you are afraid someone is hurt. You are afraid someone could die if you don't take action." Well this stopped me in my tracks. Well....yes... kind of....I was afraid or worried someone might be hurt. Just like the other day I was afraid the horse would get hurt tangled up in the fence.

I gave other examples, "Billy, I push you hard to bring up your grades cause I care. " He said, "No, because you are afraid I am going to fail." I inhaled deeply, I am afraid Billy may have a point here. Is every action we take a double-edged sword? We went over several examples and he could always turn it around with the word "afraid".

What does this mean? Could we both be right? I care about the person in the accident and that makes me afraid they might be hurt? Maybe that's the answer, " I care for others and that makes me afraid."

What the hell? This makes me a little sad, my son thinks this way. This makes me proud he is so insightful and thinks for himself. But I thought I was teaching him to be motivated by the goodness is his soul. Now he tells me we are all motivated by fear and fear alone. What the hell? I like my optimistic happy way that all humans are good!

I am confused. No more talking Billy! You are not allowed to discuss anything, anymore. Yes this scares me......I am afraid. Afraid I may be wrong.

Scratching my head.
Joytobe

Horse Lady

My husband used to affectionately call me the "Duck Lady". I'll explain this in a future post as it is quite a funny story, actually a couple of funny stories. Mostly including me making a fool of myself all for the love of nature.


Anyways I felt myself called to duty again today. Often when I take my daily walk I stop at the ranch near my house. I just watch the horses (3 of them) for a few minutes catch the morning breeze and head on my way. They are beautiful horses. Today the light brown one kept looking back at me rocking back and forth. It was an odd behavior as they usually ignore me. I took this photo.


As I watched squinting into the sun I realized it looked like his leg was stuck.







Well you know me I high tailed it over down the long gravel driveway to get a better look. Sure enough poor thing was stuck. I walked the rest of the long drive way towards the house. The other two horses came running up to the fence obviously happy and maybe amused to see me. They were beautiful and graceful. You could tell they were well cared for and adored people.


As I approached the home I heard a rather large dog barking in harmony with some high pitched yippy barking from a few other dogs. As I got to the front door this huge lab ran to the storm door barking quite ferociously. I was a little frightened but was happy for the storm door. Until the dog jumped on the door and it flew open. I like dogs. I don't think I have ever been afraid of a dog before today. I just about crapped my pants as it came charging to me. I think I heard myself in a high pitched voice say something along the lines of "good doggy", hoping to sooth this savage beast and convince him to not eat me. When the dog got to me the owner was walking out the door. She reprimanded the dog, "Duffy" the dog immediately started wagging it's tail and sniffing me.


I pulled myself together just enough to let her know about her horse. She was very appreciative and said, "I don't know why she does that. Come on Duffy we need to go get Destiny out of the fence again." As I walked back down the driveway I saw the owner cruising over to the fence in a golf cart.


Catastrophe averted. Duffy and Destiny, Duffy and Destiny I thought over and over on the rest of my walk.




Once I got home I did change my shorts. Although I didn't crap my pants I think I might have peed a little!




Affectionately Yours,
The Horse Lady

update

The surgery started late and ended at about 10:30 last night. It went really well. She was stable throughout. They got everything out that they needed to. Now it is just recovery and waiting for pathology reports on lymph nodes.

More info to follow

Joyce

Surgery Update

My mother-in-law is having surgery today to have a malignant tumor removed from her intestine. This tumor was found through a routine colonoscopy. The prognosis is very good. Although it is still very scary.

We won't have the true picture until her lymph nodes are looked at by a pathologist.

We could use some prayers for her and our family.

Thank you,
Joyce

Hyper-Sensitivity Hyper-Sensory

We recently got some scary medical news about someone very dear to me. Diagnosed with the confirmed "C" word with surgery scheduled for this Tuesday. How quickly things can change in life. It's weighing heavily on my heart. I am afraid for this person I love. I feel guilty because I have not always shown my appreciation for this person. She is like a parent to me. In fact she is a parent to me.

My walk today wasn't so much about exercise, losing weight or being physically healthy. It was entirely about mental health. I needed to clear my mind to find peace and strength. I had no idea how to do this. I asked God. Without knowing how or why..... I went into Hyper-sensory mode. Suddenly I noticed everything around me. I soaked it all in through every sense that I have.

This tree makes the most wonderful noise when the wind rustles the leaves. It sounds like falling rain.

The smell in the park of the freshly cut grass.

The sweet smelling lilac breeze rushing through my hair.

The bluest sky you ever saw.

The geese and goslings crossing the path in front of me.

The farm at the end of the road. Hearing the horses whinny and watching them swish their tail.

Looking at a tree up ahead, then noticing the feel of it's shade when you get underneath it. Looking up into the tree. Feeling it's life.

This may look just like a mud puddle to you and I. A tire track rut ruining the perfect grass. An imperfection created by man. But to the birds around here it was the greatest bath. I just watched them.

Crossing the creek that runs behind my house which contains and gives so much life.

My road to home. The beauty of "the end of the road".

My home approaches with a new outlook from when I left here 45 minutes ago.

A new understanding, a new perspective was God's gift to me today. So often all of this wonder goes unnoticed by me and others. Today the power and beauty of nature gave me strength, peace and even joy.

Thank you God,

Joytobe

Pamaism - The Thing About Wrinkles

When visiting Pama the other day I was telling her how beautiful she is. I told I couldn't believe how few wrinkles she has.

She told me, "I don't let my wrinkles worry me. If you do worry about them they just get worse." Truer words have not been spoken.

She also told me, "When I think of myself or in my dreams I see myself when I was about 18. Then I look in the mirror and I am shocked. I think who is this?"

I guess when I think of myself I see my 30 year old face. Amazing what nine years can do to change you. Just need to stop looking in the mirror. ;)

She also told me, "I never learned to drive a car. I only learned how to turn them off." There is whole post that will be dedicated to Pama's driving lesson with my grandpa.

Ode to the Pama,
Joytobe

My Sweet Puppy Dog

Okay well she is not a puppy at all but she is awfully sweet. She still plays like a puppy.

My sweet girl, Cabby. Cabby is short for Cabernet. She also is affectionately called Cabbers, My Cabby Girl or Cab. She will also answer to "What did you do? Huh Just what the heck did you do?".

Funny things about my dog.

She likes to eat paper.

If you roll a ball to her she will knock it back to you with her nose. Over and over again.

If you give her a treat and then leave the house she will not eat the treat until you return home. However, if you leave the garbage out and leave the house you will come home to a freakin mess. Explain that to me. It makes no sense. I have learned my lesson after a $1,000 dollar emergency vet bill and an incident involving 10 Famous Dave's ribs. Uuugghhh

Maybe the funniest thing is this. On Cabby's birthday we always sing "Happy Birthday" to her and then given her a dish of vanilla ice cream. In the last few years she associates the "Happy Birthday" song with her receiving ice cream. Now whenever she hears that song she freaks out, runs in circles, jumps on you and then runs to the kitchen, sits down all sweet and waits. She will wait there for an endless amount of time. She is relentless and will remain there until she gets her ice cream.

As she turned 9 this last year we decided she should get ice cream on everyone's birthday. Oh heck why not. In people years she is like 63. When I am 63 I'll eat ice cream every damn day if I want to. Problem is I don't like ice cream.......I'll eat CHEESE! hmmmm mouths watering.

Love you My Cabby Girl,

Joytobe

Tip for Tuesday - Painting

Tip For Tuesday involves painting which I have SSLLOOWWLLYY been doing to my bathroom.

Okay first tip. Even if a bathroom looks small and you think it will take an insignificant amount of time to paint.....you are dead wrong. I always forget how freakin tedious it is to paint a bathroom. all the corners, trim, caulk lines, cabinets, pipes, toilet to paint around.

Remember when I said I love to paint? well I should have prefaced it with...I love to paint at the beginning and end of a painting project. I like the excitement of the color choice and seeing that first brushstroke obliterate the dull drab previous color. I love seeing the results at the end. The middle?..... well it sucks. It just stares at you looming over your tired shoulders. And I HATE painting bathrooms.

Okay so here are my tips.

• Take lots of breaks.
• Use disposable tray liners - very inexpensive and allows you to easily take breaks.
• During short breaks saturate your brush or roller with paint then wrap it with a plastic bag tightly. This will keep it from drying out. This actually worked for me overnight.
• Poke small holes around the deepest part of the rim of the paint can on the side you are pouring from. This allows the paint that just sits in there to slowly drain back into the can.
• Take lots of breaks (oh did I say that already?) It's important.
• Never paint bathrooms!.... just kidding.

Good luck,

Joytobe

Hey YOU......

So My Honey came back from his trip Friday to Orlando. He was there for a medical conference. He came back with a lot of interesting information on being healthy which ties in perfectly to my new health kick diet!

One of the key note speakers was Dr Mehmet C. Oz. Yup Dr. Oz. I just love him since he used to be on Oprah now that he has his own show even better. So my Hubby got his book "You Staying Young" Coauthored by Dr. Michael F. Roizen. My honey met Dr Oz and got the book autographed for me!! Jeff also told Dr. Oz that I have a crush on him. hmmm It's true I do but I don't know how my honey knew that.

Anyways this book REALLY speaks to me. It's not necessarily that I want to live longer it's just that I want to live more! I want quality. And if quantity comes with it.... great. I would love to see and play with my great grandchildren.

This message is so strong to me after watching my mother slowly die. It started years before it really started. She gave up on her body even before her body gave up on her. Now I am not saying she could have stopped the MS but I think she could have managed it much better. I also know she fought depression which keeps most people including her motionless and unmotivated. No judgements here at all. I just know with all my heart I don't want to live that life so I have decided I am not going to. Whatever genetics may have thrown at me. This book is teaching me I have more control over the outcomes than I ever would have thought.

In this book they compare your body to a city. "For a city, genes are geography- whether it's built on a river, or whether it's located in a hot or cold climate, or whether it lies directly in a prevalent hurricane path. The city's geography can't inherently change. But the city can adapt to that environment, with earthquake-proof construction, underground tunnels for walking in winter time or a ferry system for commuting. The adaption the city makes to survive and to thrive is what's crucial to its vitality. The same goes for you."

It goes on to say, "Just because you've been dealt a genetic hand that predisposes you to heart disease or diabetes doesn't mean you can't mitigate the effects of those genes. One of the major things we'll teach you is that while you can't change your genes, you can change whether they are turned on or off, or how you express them."

Well I'll be danged.....Who knew?......I didn't.

Lots to learn with this book. I will be examining it carefully.
Joytobe

No Post Sundays

I think I have decided there will be no posts on Sundays. MY FAMILY DAY! And Monday is catch up day. I'll get a very important, informative post (yeah right) out a little later today.

So check back, I'm recovering from my morning walk with 100% humidity!

Joytobe

101st Day

So today marks the 101st day since I started blogging again. I started February 10th, 2010. It's hard to believe that. I am proud to say that I have kept my own personal goal in that I have posted most days. I have posted 112 times in the last 101 days. And I still have lots of ideas of things I want to say. Not sure anyone wants to hear what I have to say...but...this has really been therapeutic for me. I love to write and this has been my journal of sorts. I get to be creative in my very structured life.

When I started we were still in the thick and nasty of winter here in Siberia! Now it's lovely. I am sitting here today with the windows open enjoying the humid air of the morning and the birds chirping. Waiting for a spring thunderstorm getting ready to roll on through. My family is laughing because I love weather. I should have been a meteorologist. I love watching radar, trying to predict where the storm will go or how much precipitation there will be. Will it turn severe? I'm pretty good at it too. I guess I missed my calling.

Well my honey is home. it's great. This morning the whole family piled in my bed...excluding Billy (guess he thinks he is too old for that).....including the dog. And we all cuddled and talked and laughed and enjoyed each other. Love those mornings. I will sure miss this someday when the kids are grown!

It's a beautiful day and I am going to thoroughly enjoy my family today!
Joytobe

I feel like this today

My Honey is home. I feel like this song by Jessica Andrews. Helplessly, Hopelessly. It's an awesome song. Here are the lyrics.

I can stand with the weight of the world on my shoulders.
I can fight with the toughest of the tough.
I can laugh in the face of all my insecurities.
Anytime Anywhere Anything
I'm strong enough.

But when you're holding me like this
I'm carelessly lost in your touch.
I'm completely defenseless.
Baby it's almost too much.
I'm helplessly, hopelessly, recklessly
falling in love.

So let consequence do what it will to us
I don't care
Let the stars stand as witness to it all.
Say the word
and tonight I will follow you anywhere.
I just can't pretend anymore
I'm too sturdy to fall cause

But when you're holding me like this
I'm carelessly lost in your touch.
I'm completely defenseless.
Baby it's almost too much.
I'm helplessly, hopelessly, recklessly
falling in love.


I am not afraid.
I am not afraid.
cause

When you're holding me like this
I'm carelessly lost in your touch.
I'm completely defenseless.
Baby it's almost too much.
I'm helplessly, hopelessly, recklessly
falling.

I'm helplessly, hopelessly, recklessly
falling in love.



Here is a link to the video on Youtube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKVJPnEbOkA

My Honey's Favorite Tree

I have been out of sorts this week because my sweet Hubby has been gone all week on a business trip. Oh It just sucks without him. Being away from him really sucks! Boy does absence make my heart grow fonder! Remember last week when we were irritable with one another.



Well not any more. I miss him. I want him back. now. :( Just a few more hours!








This is his favorite tree. From our deck you can see this tree in the distance on a big hill (probably the highest elevation in our flat little town). It turns real pretty red in the fall. See how it stands above all the others. Very proud and beautiful, confident but not boastful, like "Here I am". It reminds me of Lion King and the tree of life. I love that he pointed this majestic tree out to me. I miss him.



Often when we go to sit on the deck Jeff will mention that it is his favorite tree. He knows I already know this but he feels the need to tell me again. I always smile. I love that predictability that comes from 10 years together. We still discover new stuff about each other but it is the stuff you can count on, the tried and true stuff that I cherish.

If I haven't said so already....I miss him. I love him too.


Honey, Nothing is the same without you not even your favorite tree.

I love you and I miss you!

Come home to me
Joytobe



Oops. I forgot to answer the Trivia question! I like the word "alas". Reminds me of the first Harry Potter. Hey trivia: Do you know the scene and who says "alas"? Answer Dumbledore says it in the scene at the end when Harry is in the hospital.


And a correction, the other day I posted a quote of Savanah's it went like this "Savanah was trying to show Jeff how to play this made up game called Ninja. She said, "Daddy, Billy and I are going to do a sampling to show you how to play."



And should have gone like this. "Savanah was trying to show Jeff how to play this made up game called Ninja. She said, "Daddy, Billy and I are going to do an exampling to show you how to play."



It wasn't "sampling" , it was "exampling". Sure makes it more cute and funny doesn't it? As my dear friend Amy's Dad used to say "a-duh". I sure miss him.

My Stairs....Her Imagination

This is a photo of my stairs. These are Savanah's animals. She loves playing with them. She has created a game like this is a stage. They each have to sing "In My Heart". Like American Idol the animals can get voted off of the stage. It's cute watching her do this.

The problem is this.

Each stair on my staircase has animals on it. She has begged me to leave them there. I have left them there for two days. She has played this game for two nights right before bed. I have tumbled, dodged, tripped, tiptoed and stumbled up and down these stairs for two days now! Okay somebody is going to get hurt here. She jumped all over me because if you look at the third stair from the bottom the cat is apparently been knocked over! GASP She noticed right away that it had been knocked over and was not in its original place.

Excuse ME whose house is this anyways????? huh.... huh.... MY HOUSE. That's right you heard me........ MY HOUSE......M-I-N-E mine

Oh look at that cute face. aawww flowers. oh for me. How sweet is that?

Okay keep the animals on the stairs one more night.

Yup I'm a softy, a push over. But seriously look at that face. Hard to say no to ain't it.

Holy cow It's her house now. The worst part is she knows it.

Joytobe

Beauty on the Inside....or Not

Recently I posted about my favorite rock. You can read it here if you haven't already.
http://joytobelieve.blogspot.com/2010/04/my-favorite-rock.html

That post reminded me of a story I wanted to blog about. So Here it is. The names have been changed to protect the innocent and guilty.


Billy in Kindergarten Mommy’s Pride

Billy went to Kindergarten at Homecroft Elementary School in St Paul. His teacher was named Renee. He was allowed to call her Renee. There were a set of twins in Billy’s class named Mitch and Sheila. Mitch and Billy did not get along very well. Mitch was troublesome and of course Billy was angelic. 8)

Sheila had a very noticeable facial birth defect. She was very sweet and shy. Mitch was the exact opposite of Sheila. He was handsome and obnoxious. Their mother was never friendly with me as she thought Billy was the root of Mitch’s problems at school.

We were at a school event sitting at a table with Mitch, Sheila and their Mom. We were discussing a project the kids had been working on to discover the meaning of their names. For instance, William means protector. Sheila’s mom was trying to coax Sheila into telling us the meaning of her name. She was painfully shy but eventually she whispered, “Beautiful”. Billy exclaimed to Sheila, “You are beautiful!” Sheila smiled but looked unconvinced. Billy emphatically said, “You really are beautiful.” He looked at her mom and said, “She is beautiful.”

In this moment I was so proud of Billy. My son looked past the scars on Sheila’s face and saw the truth of what really makes people beautiful, their soul. I was overwhelmed with emotion as I smiled at my young son.

Sheila’s mom smiled at Billy too, then she cocked her head to one side and said, “Well that’s nice, particularly after what you said about me.”

My mind went uuuuhhhh, uh oh! I looked at Billy with raised eyebrows. He shrugged his shoulders and said without apology or hesitation, “I said she was ugly.” I gasped.

Never in all my life have I wanted to embrace my child and then strangle them within ten seconds!

I must say though looking back at this event I acknowledge in both circumstances with Sheila and her mom, Billy was seeing the inside of the person.

I gently admonished Billy saying, "Billy that is not a nice thing to say." I then said with a bit of a smirk, "If you can't say something good then there is nothing good to say." However wrong this may be, I did not make him apologize.

Joytobe

Tip for Tuesday - Custard Dish Diet

The key to the "Custard Dish Diet" is NEVER EVER fill the custard dish with custard. Not under any circumstance!

The custard dish diet is my own little invention. Please note VERY IMPORTANT, I am not a dietitian, nutritionist, expert on dieting by any means. I put this out there as my medical disclaimer. I am not responsible. I mean....I am not responsible for you or your health! You cannot sue me!

So as I have been dieting and exercising I have observed my passionate cravings. The largest one for me is cheese!!! I love cheese. love love love cheese. When I try to ignore my cravings, they just get worse and I get crabby. So I figured out a way to "have my cheese and eat it too."

I read a study once about weight. The study was interesting in that it followed people who were overweight trying to lose weight. But it also followed thin, healthy people who never dieted. They found the healthy fit people would crave something with high calories then eat it. (with portion control) The overweight people would crave something with high calories then try to avoid that craving by eating something else and then eating something else. The third thing they ate ended up being what they were originally craving. Then they would be satisfied.

Okay so I start with a healthy breakfast (oatmeal, cereal) and a healthy lunch (salad, turkey sandwich) and a smaller size dinner. My husband is the best cook and he makes fattening stuff (fettuccine Alfredo) so I really have to limit my calories during the day and then limit my portions at night. I drink lots of water. Anything low fat, low calorie that I can tolerate without feeling like I am denying myself I use (low fat mayo, ranch dressing, etc).

Now my big problems have been the in between meals hunger. And cravings.

So I decided to satisfy my cravings. I have found that eating a small amount of what I am craving actually will satisfy the craving.

Now I am allowed 3 snacks a day. In fact three custard dish size snacks.

Examples of some of my snacks are:

Cottage cheese
Two tablespoons of any light dressing or light dip with 15 small stick pretzels. (satisfies my dipping need)
2 pieces of cheese with two crackers.
small piece of chocolate with a little peanut butter
cut up cucumber with a tablespoon of light dressing (if you take out the seeds it won't give you gas)
cut up red pepper with light dressing
Yogurt
Banana with 1 tablespoon of peanut butter
Baby Carrots dipped in light dressing

Now if we are having something very fattening for dinner I may cut out 1 snack. Or if it is a day I will not get to exercise I may cut out 1 snack.

Another key to this working is to prepare your snacks and don't eat one bite until you have put all the ingredients away. I used to eat a piece or two or three of cheese while I was cutting it up. Or I would leave the cheese out. Oh so easy to cut off another piece!

Now I have been doing this about three weeks, I have lost 8 pounds. I am rarely hungry and I feel satisfied. The hardest part of this is dinner time for me. Such yummy meals and I want to keep eating! and eating and eating.

I know everyone is different so what works for me may not work for you. But I thought I should share this since it's different and it is working for me.

Joytobe

Great Fun

I've had great fun this weekend. I planted. I weeded. I mulched. I played. I painted.



Yes it was a great weekend. Now Monday. :( Well not really :( But I do love spending all of this uninterrupted time with my family.



Now perfect for a Monday morning.....I want to throw my computer out the window. I am soooo close. Had nothing but problems this morning. I plan to catch up on my posts for this week today if she (my computer) will hold up.



I changed my plans this weekend, after overhauling my upstairs bathroom this past week I was going to paint my bathroom all weekend. An awesome mocha tan color from Behr called Toffee Crunch. But alas the sun and yard work pulled me outdoors. I like the word "alas". Reminds me of the first Harry Potter. Hey trivia: Do you know the scene and who says "alas"?

I did paint a little. So this week I paint! I love to paint. I'm pretty good at it too, if I don't say so myself.

So I am going to push this post out before my computer craps out again. I'll post more later....hopefully.

Joytobe

A Beautiful Saturday

It is a beautiful Saturday and I intend to spend most of it outside enjoying the sunshine....not sitting at the computer! So here are a couple cute and funny quotes from my family.

My son Billy told me this gem. "If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?"

Last night Jeff and I were watching The Marriage Ref with Billy. Not sure if this is appropriate but hey it's funny and Billy can handle it. This is most obvious by the comment he made. In this episode there was a REALLY creepy guy. I mean make-your-skin-crawl creepy! Jeff and I were both thinking to ourselves, this guy could be a pedophile or stalker or something. So Billy says, "This guy could be riding around in a rusted red windowless van with "Free Candy" written on the side." Jeff and I both doubled over in laughter! Dang is Billy funny!

Savanah was trying to show Jeff how to play this made up game called Ninja. She said, "Daddy, Billy and I are going to do a sampling to show you how to play." Sampling- huh I like that word.

Gotta go..the breeze is calling to me.
Enjoy your day.
Joytobe

Nowthen

You may remember the other day I posted about my favorite sign. If not here is the link to read about it. http://joytobelieve.blogspot.com/2010/04/my-favorite-sign.html

Well today I am talking about the stop sign above. This is the only thing separating me from civilization. Humanity at its finest. The hustle and bustle of Elk River!

On my side of this sign you see homes, farms, ranches with horses and cattle, prairie, woods and dirt roads. It is serene. My neighborhood doesn't necessarily fit into this serene picture. It is just a regular old suburban neighborhood. But it serves its purpose...it is my home. Just past my neighborhood is where all this beauty lies.

About five miles past my neighborhood is a small town called Nowthen. At its origination it was called Burns Township officially established in 1869. However the first birth in this town was recorded in 1857. The first marriage was also recorded in 1857. Not sure which came first? hmmm shotgun weeding? Anyways the population as of the 2000 census was 3,357.

The interesting thing about Nowthen was how it got its name. The official story on the city website is this.

Jim Hare (first postmaster) was credited in naming the Nowthen Post Office. History says that Hare wrote to Washington requesting a Post Office in Burns Township. The Post Office Department indicated that they could not approve the Burns Post Office because there was already Burnstown Township Post Office in Southern Minnesota. The department asked Hare for suggestions for a new name. Jim Hare sent a letter to the department with several suggested names. At the end of his letter he stated "nowthen" and signed it. Not knowing that Hare often started and ended his sentences with "nowthen", the department thought it was a pretty good name and named Burns Township's Post Office the Nowthen Post Office.

Even after the Nowthen Post Office closed in July 31, 1894 the residents still referred to the area around the Post Office as Nowthen.

In 2007 Nowthen was incorporated into a city! It is a darling little community. I love going to Nowthen.

So that is one side of the stop sign. And God help me but on the other side of the stop sign is Walmart. This stop sign is the only thing that stands between me and Walmart. Only one stop sign....no street lights....just one measly stop sign.

Stop...no really Stop

Joytobe

Words We Don't Mean

Have you ever had a day or night that you and your love were just off? Not in sync. Maybe one is grouchy and then the other gets irritated. And it snowballs into this very yucky feeling. All you want to do is go to bed and try this again tomorrow.



I am sure this happens to every couple. It happened to me and my love the other day. Whenever this happens (thankfully not very often) I think of this Amy Grant song called "That's What Love is For". It helps me feel better. Reminds me of the big beautiful picture. Here are some of the lyrics.




Sometimes we make it harder than it is

We’ll take a perfect night

And fill it up with words we don’t mean

Dark sides best unseen



And we wonder why we’re feeling this way.

Sometimes I wonder if we really feel the same

Why we can be unkind

Questioning the strongest of hearts



That’s when we must start

Believing in the one thing that has gotten us this far.

That’s what love is for.



Melt our defenses

Bring us back to our senses

Round off the edges

Talk us down from the ledges



Sometimes I see you

And you don’t know I am there

And I’m washed away by emotions

I hold deep down inside

Getting stronger with time

It’s living through the fire

And holding on we find



That's what love is for
Joytobe

Pamaism Day

Okay I visited my dear Pama yesterday. She had a doctor appointment that went great. She is quite healthy and happy.



I have a few Pamaism. What is a Pamaism? See this post for an explanation. http://joytobelieve.blogspot.com/2010/04/pamaism.html


It is hard to choose which one to write about. So I guess I'll start with this.

My sister Vivian went to see Pama the other day. They sat by the bird aviary that is filled with finches. So Pama says, "Isn't it amazing how easy it is to love almost anything?"

So looking at this quote you think, what a sweet, loving, kind lady! And she certainly is, however she has a sassy side.

Yesterday while visiting Pama, I told her how in Billy's play he had to have a sword fight with his ex-girlfriend. She chuckled and said, "I bet that was tempting for him." I told her the sword was made of wood. She said, "Oh too bad"

The lesson in this story is don't cross my 92 year old grandma. Cause I bet my grandma could beat up your grandma!

She may be sweet but she is feisty too.

I love both of those qualities,
"Sweet and Sassy"
Joytobe

Tip For Tuesday - Spring Cleaning

To Spring Clean or not to Spring Clean? That is the question.

Whenever I think of "spring cleaning" I think of 1950's housewives. That brings a guttural uuugggghhh from my bowels. I am not a 1950's housewife. I am not June Cleaver. I am not even Morticia Adams.

I am a Domestic Engineer. So I don't do "spring clean". I do however take time in the spring and fall to "overhaul" my home. I try to make it fun though.

I work in only one room at a time. (very important so you don't get overwhelmed!) This week I am working on the upstairs bathroom.

First I declutter all the cabinets. Throwing out anything that is no longer used (expired medications, old make up, etc.)

Then I reorganizing the stuff that is used. While reorganizing I take stock of anything I need to replenish, soap, sunscreen, etc.

Then I do a very thorough cleaning. (the un-fun part). I clean those parts of the bathroom that go unnoticed during your average cleaning. The grout. the caulk. the window blinds. the lighting fixtures. Soak the trash can. Lift the little knobs off the bottom of the toilet.....eeewwweee gross, clean that too. After this major sweep.....

I fix anything that need to do be fixed or done. For instance every year in this process, I reseal the grout around the tile. Wow looks awesome.

Then I look through the room with a fresh eye. What do I love in this room? What do I hate in this room? What small decorating things can I change with no cost? What color would I like this room to be? Make a wish list of things that cost money that you would like to change in this room. Keep a folder for every room in your house. When you see something in a magazine that you love. Put it in there with your wish list.

Then by all means paint the room the color you want it to be. Now this costs a little money but it is the most dramatic inexpensive change you can make!

Then love the room!

Now move on to another room.
Joytobe

Running late

Sorry I am running late! I have to take Pama to a Dr appointment, (no worries just a check up). Tip for Tuesday- Spring Cleaning Edition will be posted later today.

Check around 3:00- ish.

Thanks
Joytobe

Who Knows Me?

Facebook is really interesting to me. Recently I have become "facebook friends" with people from my past. Friends from high school. Even friends from elementary school. People I have worked for and with over the years. Through these new/old interactions I have started thinking...... who really knows me?


Those that really know me the least I think are the ones who have worked for me. Many of these people I would have wanted to be friends with. In a manager role you are not really allowed (the unwritten rule) to be friends with those who report to you. I could never truly show myself to them. I had to keep a wall of propriety between us. I had to implement company policies without showing my true opinion or many emotions. I couldn't really befriend anyone for fear of playing favorites. And above all I couldn't show my wicked sense of humor. I am really unconventional as that goes.


I like to think I helped some of them by either being someone who would listen or by giving them career or situational advise. But sad as it may be I don't think they ever got to know me. I like to think they would have liked the real me. The playful, insightful and humorous me.


I suppose in any relationship you adjust for appropriateness. I will allow some of my different characteristics to surface with some people more than others. That is normal and right I suppose.


The person who knows me best is my husband. I can let completely go with him and know I will not be judged. I will still be held accountable for my words or actions but not judged.

Joytobe

Happy Mother's Day

To all the Mommies out there. Here's to you!

Mother Prayer

Dear Lord,today we pray for mothers--
our own mothers, and mothers everywhere,
who have made such a major contribution
to the good qualities we have,
sometimes through genetics,
more often through great effort and patient instruction,
and who have done their best
to gently polish away our rough edges.

Lord, please bless our mothers
for the endless hours of time they spent
and the boundless energy they invested in us.
Bless our mothers for their sacrifices on our behalf
as they often gave up or deferred their own dreams
so that we could have ours.

Bless our mothers for always being there for us,
for being the person we know we can turn to
when we need comfort, encouragement, or just a hug.
Bless our mothers for making a home for us
where we could feel safe, where we felt we belonged.

Most of all, Lord,bless our mothers for their unconditional love,
for loving us no matter what,
and for frequently showing love
in ways that make us feel valued and cherished.

Lord, please bless our mothers mightily.
Strengthen them, soothe them,wrap them in Your infinite love
and shower them with blessings
too numerous to count, too magnificent to describe.
We love them, admire them, respect them,
and we wish that You would give them back
many times the good they gave to us.
Amen
By Joanna Fuchs


Thank you Mom,
Joytobe

Mr.Okasaki... Thank You

My Dear Mr. Okasaki wrote this in my yearbook of my junior year.

"Joyce- There are so many things one can say about conservatives: a) They're usually old b)narrow minded and c) intolerant. But there is only one good thing one can say - IT IS CURABLE! Besides you don't fool me - You are a closet liberal aren't you? It has been fun and interesting having those political discussions in our science class. Hope you learned something from it - maybe even a little science. The very best to you always. Your friend, Mr. O"


When I knew you I was still a product of my parent's beliefs and political denomination. I suppose we all start out that way.


Mr. Okasaki, I learned science from you and oh so much more. Most importantly you showed me how to find my confidence. You showed me I could voice my opinion without retribution. I grew up in a less than stellar home. You were not allowed to disagree. My father was ALWAYS right. There was no point to discussion, you couldn't win and your opinion would never be respected.


You taught me how to respectfully disagree with an elder. (sorry to call you an elder!) Our discussions mean more to me than you will probably ever know. Although you and I often disagreed and probably would still today, I always had the highest respect for you. You were the first adult in my life who listened to my argument, disagreed and respected me.


Perhaps this lesson was important for you to teach as you were born in an American Concentration camp for Japanese-Americans in World War II. A time when Japanese-Americans weren't allowed a voice or freedom.


Through our discussions I think the entire class learned this lesson too. As teenagers they might not have known they were learning this lesson but we sure made an impression on them because here are some of the other entries from that yearbook.


"It's been great having you in my science class and listening to your arguments with the teacher."


"It's been great having you in Mr. O's science class and seeing you always argue with him."


"I have learned so much from you being in science class together."


"Multi-science has been fun this year! You and Mr. O arguing."


"I've had a lot of fun this semester in science."


"It was fun knowing you in science."


"I'm happy that we met this year. It was exciting hearing you and Mr. O arguing."


"Joyce, So glad I got to know you and that you didn't let Mr. O's opinions sway you. Hope to see you next year." Mrs. Love


Like I said we for sure made an impression on those young minds.


However the questions still stands... Am I a liberal or a conservative....democrat or republican? I don't know! I am neither and I am both. In the middle I suppose. Right where I am supposed to be.


Just wanted to give a huge thank you to the best teacher I have ever had. I am not sure what I remember that you taught me about science. But I have become successful in life because of you for teaching me to respectfully stand up for myself.


Thank you


Joyce

Mother's Day and a Birthday Wish

Mother's Day by definition means: An annual day for honoring mothers and motherhood observed on the second Sunday of May.

Mother by definition means: n.1. A female parent 2. A female who holds a position of authority or responsibility. v. (mothered) 1. to give birth to; be the mother of. 2. To create; produce 3. To watch over, nourish and protect.

I suppose the most significant of words I would use to describe a mother would be; one who loves unconditionally, guides, teaches and protects her children. It is my greatest desire to be described with these words.

For many years I had a love/hate relationship with Mother's Day. My own Mother, God rest her soul, did not give me many of the things I needed. Mostly protection. I traveled a difficult path that today indeed I would protect my own children from with my life. Forgiveness and unconditional love was/is my last eternal gift to my mother.

Today is May 7th, 2010. The birthday of my first born daughter, Katie. I love you with all of my heart! Happy Birthday

On May 7th, 1987 at the age of 15 I became a mother, at least a biological mother. I gave birth. I love this daughter as if she were my own. But she is not my own for I gave her to another mother. One that could take care of her in a way that I could not. A mother that could protect her with the wisdom that comes from age. A mother who would, did and does love her as much as I do. The love of a mother who could not have children of her own. I have never stopped caring and worrying over her well being.

She has asked me the what if question? What if I had kept her? This does break my heart. I don't know. It didn't seem like an option at the time. I did what I thought was best for her.

So Mother's Day was/is bittersweet for me. I honored my mother but felt emptiness for I too had the love in my heart for my child. I was a mother but I was not a mother.

This sounds selfish so I apologize. I was not celebrated on Mother's day. Rightfully so I was not honored or recognized on Mother's day. Deep down it hurt. Again this sounds so selfish to me but it is the truth of my feelings. With guilt over these feelings I have asked myself, "What about this child who maybe felt abandoned by her mother?" I have prayed every day that she would feel and know my love for her.

Many years later when my son, Billy was born, I was recognized as a "Mother". It made Mother's Day a little less painful but the sting was still there underneath.

The underlying pain of my own childhood and the lost years of my first born daughter's childhood is still there today. Maybe a little stronger this year with the passing of my mother. I suppose now I know what it feels like to not have my mother.

Joyce

Life Altering

My sweet Savanah is in love. Lordy..help me cool her jets. Yes she is 7. But truly she has a ginormous (gigantic and enormous put together) crush. This crush is on the captain of Billy's play. Captain Jennings. She drools when she sees this boy. She cannot stop staring at him.





And this is what she told me, "My life has been changed. This has changed my life. He changed my life."





God help me.

Joytobe

My Pama

My Pama is my grandmother, Evelyn. Isn't she a beauty? She was always beautiful. This photo was taken this year on her 92nd birthday. I hope I look like her when I am 92 years old. More importantly I hope I am just like her when I am 92 years old. She is funny and happy and forgetful. The truth of the matter is she used to be shy but I think she forgot that she was shy. She smiles and says hello to everyone she sees.

My Grandmother was born in Knoxville Tennessee on February 4th, 1918. She was born with a twin. My grandmother's true name is Thelma Eveylyn, (she never liked the name Thelma). Her twin was named Zelma. Can you imagine Thelma and Zelma? Her twin died at about two weeks old. She had an older sister named Wilma also.

So it was Thelma, Zelma and Wilma. ;)

Pama's parents both contracted Tuberculosis and moved to El Paso Texas for treatment. Because of it's warm dry climate El Paso attracted many with tuberculosis.

She lived in an orphanage called Southwestern Children's Home. On her way to school every day she would pass the treatment center where her mother was being treated. They would wheel her mother to the window so she could wave to her girls. She wasn't allowed to see her mother for fear of bringing TB germs into the home. She never touched her mother again and only saw her through a window pane. She died when Pama was approximately 6 years old. Her father died shortly after that.

She and her sister were orphans. My grandmother has many stories about living in the orphanage. It was started by Reverend Hogg and his wife. Shortly after that a prominent Attorney named Victor Moore began running the orphanage. Pama referred to Victor Moore as "Daddy Moore". She loved him dearly. But life was not all pleasant at the orphanage. Victor's wife was very stern and religious. She ruled with an iron hand. All the children had to call her, "My Dearie". According to Pama, "My Dearie" couldn't stand pama and treated her poorly, perhaps because Daddy Moore adored Pama? To this day when Pama tells a story about the orphanage she says "My Dearie" with disgust in her voice and a roll of her eyes.

My grandmother moved from the home at age 18. She and her sister lived together until she met and fell in love with my grandfather, Pampa. He passed away 20 years ago.

Unfortunately, all of her parents belongings (photos, family records) were burned because of germs. I have searched for records and photos of them for her and have been unable to find anything. All she had left of them were her memories.

Three years ago we moved my Pama from her home she shared with Pampa in El Paso to Minnesota so we could take care of her. Now it seemed as we moved her into assisted living that she was being put back into an institution. Through the guardianship battle she lost her home and many of her most precious belongings by the hand of her evil son. (A whole grueling and gruesome story in itself.)

Throughout the move and guardianship battle with my uncle her photograph of "Daddy Moore" was lost. Now with her memory fading I felt I needed to find something of the past for her to hold onto. Something tangible she could look at or see that proved her existence or self worth. We all need reminders of where we have been through photos or writings or documents. She had nothing....again. I felt awful about all of this.

So I started searching the Internet again for info on her parents. I could find nothing. So I searched for Victor Moore, "Daddy Moore".

Then I found a treasure!

A book called "A Chance for Every Child". I was so freakin excited! This book was about two children's homes is El Paso Texas that combined to make the existing structure of Center for Children El Paso. The two homes were St Margaret's started in 1919 and Southwestern Childrens Home started in 1925 (yup you guessed it...this is where pama lived as a child!) I contacted one of the authors Sandy Ruiz, (He is the director of this organization still today). He was a very gracious man who sent me a copy.

When I received the book in the mail I just about cried. There were so many photos. A beautiful picture of my pama's beloved, "Daddy Moore". Photos of the home. Photos of the summer cabin in Ruidoso that my Pama always spoke of.

When I gave this book to my grandmother I can say it was profound and perhaps the most significant gift I could have ever given her. This is one of my more proud moments in life to be able to witness so much joy as she looked through the book pointing out things in the pictures. The window to the bedroom where she slept as a child in a orphanage which is no longer standing. This book gave her a missing piece of her past. I was thrilled to be a part of it. To listen to her childhood stories now with a photo. Now as her memory continues to fade she has this solid proof of her past.

I love you Pama.

Joytobe

Tip for Tuesday - Inspiration and fun!

Make a book of quotes.

I love my book of quotes

My dear awesome, smart, funny, pretty (she is probably reading this) sister Brenda started this brilliant idea. And I have to share it.

She has this cool journal type book. Actually it is exactly the same as mine pictured here. She uses it to write down quotes that she finds inspirational or funny. When I saw this book I knew I had to get one. Then she bought it for me as a gift.

Now whenever I am somewhere and I see or hear a quote that I love I write it down and put it in my quote book. Often when I am looking for inspiration I turn to my quote book. It helps me find my smile.

My sister and I live a few hundred miles from each other. :( But when we get together we compare our quote books, taking inspiration from each other.

Isn't that pen fun too!?!? I love different funny pens. When you write with this pen the beads on top jiggle and make a fun noise.

Then again I love pretty much any office/school supply. God help me when shopping for school supplies. I always over buy, oops guess I'll have to keep that for myself! My addiction to office supplies could be a post all by itself. hmmmmm wheels are turning.

I love it!

Joytobe

Zip...Zero...Zilch...Nothing...Nil...Nada

Yeah! This is my calendar for today! You see that?! Nothing!!! This is indeed a rarity. It is unprecedented. I don't know what to do with myself!

Just Kidding. I certainly have things to do but Wow...what a relief to see an empty day on a calendar especially after such a busy weekend. I am not sure "Nada" is a real word or how to spell it.

Still struggling with this cold but it is manageable.

Anyways with all this time on my hands maybe I can get caught up and write some future posts.

So look for something new from me later.

Got lots of ideas brewing.

Joytobe

The End......TaDa

Oh the end of "The Lady Pirates of Captain Bree". It is bittersweet. Last night was the best performance. So much beautiful young energy. It was electric. You could tell the seniors were feeling the moment. After the play I saw some tears shed, the last play of high school.

Billy did a great job. I think he felt a little sad.

I met Billy's new girlfriend. I liked her. She was sweet and cute. Polite. I won't mind him hanging out with her. I think she will appreciate him.

Savanah was a little devastated that this was the last play. She sat through that play 4 times and still loved it. Now my child has been to many plays. She loves them. She has been fortunate to see Broadway productions of Phantom of the Opera, Annie and The Wizard of Oz at the Ordway theater and the Orpheum. She has gone every season to the world renowned Children's Theater in Minneapolis. She is no stranger to the stage. However she told me this, Billy's play was her favorite play ever. Needless to say this was quite the compliment.

Well I have one more "haf-too" this weekend. A "Haf-too" is something that HAS to be done, no way out! Versus a "wan-too" Something you want to do but can be flexible or delayed.

It's been a fun filled hectic beautiful weekend!
Joytobe

Karate Tournament and a Play

This morning Savanah participated in a Karate Tournament. I will post pictures. I was so proud of her! Mostly because she wavered several times about participating. She was scared, really scared. But she faced her fear and did great. She was even a team captain. I was choked up big time!

Tonight is closing night of Billy's play. I am so proud of him also.

After this things should settle down a little.....maybe. Although Billy and some friends are starting a band. WayPoint So there will be practices. uuugggghhhh

Ahhh the incredibly proud and tired Mama,
Joytobe