Wednesday, May 5, 2010

My Pama




My Pama is my grandmother, Evelyn. Isn't she a beauty? She was always beautiful. This photo was taken this year on her 92nd birthday. I hope I look like her when I am 92 years old. More importantly I hope I am just like her when I am 92 years old. She is funny and happy and forgetful. The truth of the matter is she used to be shy but I think she forgot that she was shy. She smiles and says hello to everyone she sees.


My Grandmother was born in Knoxville Tennessee on February 4th, 1918. She was born with a twin. My grandmother's true name is Thelma Eveylyn, (she never liked the name Thelma). Her twin was named Zelma. Can you imagine Thelma and Zelma? Her twin died at about two weeks old. She had an older sister named Wilma also.



So it was Thelma, Zelma and Wilma. ;)



Pama's parents both contracted Tuberculosis and moved to El Paso Texas for treatment. Because of it's warm dry climate El Paso attracted many with tuberculosis.


She lived in an orphanage called Southwestern Children's Home. On her way to school every day she would pass the treatment center where her mother was being treated. They would wheel her mother to the window so she could wave to her girls. She wasn't allowed to see her mother for fear of bringing TB germs into the home. She never touched her mother again and only saw her through a window pane. She died when Pama was approximately 6 years old. Her father died shortly after that.


She and her sister were orphans. My grandmother has many stories about living in the orphanage. It was started by Reverend Hogg and his wife. Shortly after that a prominent Attorney named Victor Moore began running the orphanage. Pama referred to Victor Moore as "Daddy Moore". She loved him dearly. But life was not all pleasant at the orphanage. Victor's wife was very stern and religious. She ruled with an iron hand. All the children had to call her, "My Dearie". According to Pama, "My Dearie" couldn't stand pama and treated her poorly, perhaps because Daddy Moore adored Pama? To this day when Pama tells a story about the orphanage she says "My Dearie" with disgust in her voice and a roll of her eyes.


My grandmother moved from the home at age 18. She and her sister lived together until she met and fell in love with my grandfather, Pampa. He passed away 20 years ago.



Unfortunately, all of her parents belongings (photos, family records) were burned because of germs. I have searched for records and photos of them for her and have been unable to find anything. All she had left of them were her memories.



Three years ago we moved my Pama from her home she shared with Pampa in El Paso to Minnesota so we could take care of her. Now it seemed as we moved her into assisted living that she was being put back into an institution. Through the guardianship battle she lost her home and many of her most precious belongings by the hand of her evil son. (A whole grueling and gruesome story in itself.)



Throughout the move and guardianship battle with my uncle her photograph of "Daddy Moore" was lost. Now with her memory fading I felt I needed to find something of the past for her to hold onto. Something tangible she could look at or see that proved her existence or self worth. We all need reminders of where we have been through photos or writings or documents. She had nothing....again. I felt awful about all of this.



So I started searching the Internet again for info on her parents. I could find nothing. So I searched for Victor Moore, "Daddy Moore".



Then I found a treasure!

A book called "A Chance for Every Child". I was so freakin excited! This book was about two children's homes is El Paso Texas that combined to make the existing structure of Center for Children El Paso. The two homes were St Margaret's started in 1919 and Southwestern Childrens Home started in 1925 (yup you guessed it...this is where pama lived as a child!) I contacted one of the authors Sandy Ruiz, (He is the director of this organization still today). He was a very gracious man who sent me a copy.


When I received the book in the mail I just about cried. There were so many photos. A beautiful picture of my pama's beloved, "Daddy Moore". Photos of the home. Photos of the summer cabin in Ruidoso that my Pama always spoke of.



When I gave this book to my grandmother I can say it was profound and perhaps the most significant gift I could have ever given her. This is one of my more proud moments in life to be able to witness so much joy as she looked through the book pointing out things in the pictures. The window to the bedroom where she slept as a child in a orphanage which is no longer standing. This book gave her a missing piece of her past. I was thrilled to be a part of it. To listen to her childhood stories now with a photo. Now as her memory continues to fade she has this solid proof of her past.


I love you Pama.

Joytobe

4 comments:

Amy said...

Wow, Joyce. What an amazing, moving, beautiful story of your sweet Pama. :) Thank you for sharing.

Rick McKinley said...

Most EXCELLANT Joyce!!

joy said...

Thank you Amy and Rick! I
appreciate it!

Anonymous said...

Brings tears to my eyes Joyce. And a smile to my face. It could be a movie, right to the bitter end if you know what I mean. xoxo Miss and love you, Brenda