Every parent has moments of torture when you are faced with a dilemma when you don't have the answers. You just don't know what to do. You are at wits end.
Then you summon all of your knowledge and courage to make a decision. You hold your breath and pray fervently that you have done the right thing. You always leave room for revision because sometimes you will err.
I have found these unbelievable difficult moments become more numerous the older a child gets. I am hoping we hit a plateau soon with the age of 16. I may not survive to 17!
We had a slow steady build of pressure around here over the last few months. Culminating over the last few days with a very dramatic ending to a very dramatic turbulent relationship. During this time I have wracked my brain trying to save my child from pain or at least help him navigate through it. And it isn't over yet. close but not completely.
I found I cannot really protect him. I can help guide him with my advice regardless of if he wants it or not. I can remind him of his morals. I can be there to listen and be a shoulder to lean on. I can PRAY and Pray and pray.
But ultimately he is responsible for his action and reaction.
This never became more prevalent to me then last night when my son and I were talking about all of this upheaval. How hard it is. I was listening. Then he thanked me! I was flabbergasted. He said, "Thank you for letting me go through this. I needed to learn this myself."
Picture me with my jaw on the floor, eyes bulging completely speechless.
Now that I have had time to process this statement I realize this is one of those stunning moments in life where you realized you did the right thing. And I felt so proud of him because he made the right decision and he weathered a pretty rough storm.
We'll make it through all of this and more because we are family. We will always be there for each other.
Joytobe
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