CHICKEN

Bak bak bak beeekaaahhhhk What is that? That is the sound of a chicken as best I can figure it would be spelled. You know the sound a chicken makes? Why you ask?

I have recently discovered I am a chicken. A big chicken scaredy cat. meow.

We have recently decided I should probably get a part time job. You see, last year we paid a lot of expenses for my grandmother. I mean a lot, big $$$$$$. In order to do this we took some money - a lot- out of my qualified savings account. Now we planned for the extra taxes and penalties with our budgeting. What we failed to plan for is the fact that this extra income through us into a new tax bracket. Dramatically changing our taxes!!!! So although we have survived fine with one income as the year comes to an end, and we continue to pay some of my grandmother's expenses, well....let's just say we could really use a little extra money.

It doesn't help that my ex-husband does not pay his half of my son's expenses (driver ed fees, drama fees, lunch money) and pays NO CHILD SUPPORT even though he is supposed to. He has not paid child support in 7 YEARS. I have yelled, begged, pleaded and threatened him for 7 Years. And to be honest up until now it just seemed like too much of a pain in the ass to go after him with an attorney. That will change soon too!

Now that Savanah is in 3rd grade well it seems time for me to work. I would still like to be home when the kids get home.

Okay so on to what makes me a chicken %&*$. I am scared to get a job. I haven't worked in 7 years. I have started to update my resume. OH Yuck. I tried to find my old resume. HA HA I found it. It is on an old HARD computer disk. ha can you believe that? I don't have a computer with that old kind of disc drive. So I started from scratch. YUCK

Then thinking of the interview process just makes my heart pound with anxiety. Even if I could get an interview in these times. Jobs are hard to come by.

What I find amusing about all of this.....I used to be so confident in the workplace. I use to interview so well. Actually their is only one job I have ever interviewed for that I didn't get. I was eighteen and the job was way over my head. But now my armpits are damp just thinking about it. Sorry to be gross!

I have done all this before. I just forgot how to do it.

Any suggestions?

Looking for courage,
Joytobe